Discovery Home & Health

My son is growing before my eyes and I think we’re getting to the stage where we need to stop some of the baby habits he has. With another on the way I’d ideally like to start tackling these sooner whilst I’ve got time to rather than later. So if you don’t mind sharing with me..

When did you/are you planning on stopping:

Dummies? DS still has one just at night/nap time when he’s going to sleep. Is perfectly able to go to sleep without one, it’s just that he likes to sleep with one. I’d like to stop this asap as it’ll be harder once new baby’s here if she/he has one.

Sleeping in a cot? Again, still in a cot, I’m not in much of a rush to convert his cotbed into a cot as he moves about loads when sleeping and I don’t think he’d stay in bed very long if he could get out. Also he’s very attached to his sleeping bag that’s another thing that will have to go once he’s in a big bed. Concidering making the change when he’s about 2?

Bottles? Currently just has one before bed and one in the morning.. still happily has 7oz milk at each no signs of dropping it yet should I wait until he isn’t fussed about having milk or start putting it in a beaker?

And when are you planning on starting:

Potty training? i realise all children are different and I’d be mad to try force this on him when he isn’t ready (no where near actually) and also that boys generally start later than girls but should I get him a potty just so he knows what it is? he knows toilets are for wee wees but hasn’t ever seen a potty and a lot of people keep nagging me to buy him one.

Thanks girls

x

hey kaly,

ailey still has a dummie for bed not during the day but for bed he loves it and i dnt think its a problem if they have one for bed cos if he asks for babies dummy u just say no darling urs is in your bed aint it u have it at bedtime, and he also has a bottle for bed he takes his dummie and a bottle with him lol he dosnt have one in a morning he has a beaker, but again i dnt think its a big deal them taking a bottle to bed they are still young

with him in a cot, bailey is in a cotbed and we found it hard him getting up and down but he could climb out the cot so it seemed silly to keep him in it, i think personaly there is no rush to put him in a bed and once hes in a bed u take away the sleeping bag then, like new bed big boy pj's so to speak lol, he is probs safer in a cot when the new baby comes as he wont be able to get up and touch the baby whilst your asleep u wouldnt want him pulling at the moses basket,

potty training, well we did buy bailey a potty for xmas so he could get use to seeing it about n we tell him what its for and when he sees it he goes mummy poo and i say yeh darling uihave a poo and ask him if he would like to sit on it and he does but dnt stay there lol he aint ready for undies yet, he does tell us when he has pood and sometimes before but hes far to young,

i was thinking aroud the summer to train bailey as they can run around with nout on then lol saves on washing lol oliver is around the same age as bailey

but i think everything u are doing and have done is around spot on i did speak to my hv about all of these things and she was very happy with the way things are, to be honest the situation at the moment isnt unbearable is it?? and probs easier to keep him happy till the baby gets here and everyone all settled in

hope this helped think i started to waffle

thanks kia it's good to know i'm not alone.

you're right it's not unbarable right now but i think some of the things i still let him do are just out of habit not because he actually 'needs' to. I want to do away with dummies mainly because although i don't let him have them at all in the day MIL does, like constantly every time i pick him up there's always one in his mouth and it drives me nuts because it confuses him then when i only give him it at night. Sounds daft but he has such a lovely set of teeth i don't want them to be spoiled by having a dummy all the time as I’ve seen what damage they can do.

I’ve tried talking to her about it but she does not listen at all (her way is always best even with MY child) I don’t want an argument it’s pointless so I thought to solve this I’d do away with them all together what do you think?

x

Hi Kalyjade - re the dummy thing - my DS just grew out of his by himself - I didn't "try" to wean him off it - and I reckon kids give them up when they are ready. I wouldn't go cold turkey - you'll have some sleepless nights! Maybe when you take maternity leave (presumeably he won't go to MIL all day then??) you could try weening it off him if it bothers you? If you try to take it too soon - he might resort to thumb sucking and thats a much harder habit to break! My brother is 25 and still sucks his thumb!!! You never see a school aged child sucking a dummy do you?!!

I agree with kia - no rush for any of the things you mention - especially not potty training - boys take AGES!! DS was 3 once we finally cracked it - they say start at 2 trained by 3 start at 3 and still trained by 3. No panic. And the agro with your MIL is surely not worth it for sake of a few months extra dummy sucking? MILs can be such a nightmare if they want to be.....I'd dread it if mine suddenly turned against me as DP holds a lot of store by her opinion!

You might find DS goes backwards a little when no 2 arrives - this is apprently really common and normal for the older sibling to go back to being a baby again temporarily when they're still a bit worried about you not loving them anymore. You could make all this effort now and have a lot of hassle then find he goes right back to it when baby comes anyway - I'd wait til the dust settles after baby comes.

Good luck anyway whatever you decide to do!!

i know what ur saying,

bailey loves his dummy so much id feel awful taking it away but if hes happily going to sleep without it then he aint gonna miss it, u will probs have a couple of tears but it dnt last long, go for it hun

and as for ur mil i would make an argument as he is ur baby, i tel dwaynes mum that bailey dnt have dummy during the day and she dnt give it id be very mad and so would dwayne he would tell her himself maybe get DH to talk to her and say do not give him the dummy

and the other things he will probs give them up on his own lol

hiya hun,

Just thought I would chuck in my 2p's worth for you
Obviously Emily is a lot younger, but I do also have the benefit of my sisters exerience (2 boys, 9 and 19months)

none of ours have had dummies so I can't really comment on that, but I would say if he can go to sleep fine without it, is there much point giving it ? Maybe if he likes to have something at bedtime, he could have a teddy or something?

Keeping in a cot at that stage is fine,the one thing I would say, is it might be worth moving to a cotbed / toddler bed before the baby is born otherwise when the baby needs to go into the cot, he may see it as being moved out of the way to make room for baby?? I agree with kia tho about being careful of him getting out - will they be sharing a room?

Bottles - I was advised that babies over 1 shouldn't have a bottle, its something to do with the way they suck and the milk / drink hanging around their teeth isn't good. Emily has a beaker with a straw now and doesn't take anything to bed. Again - entirely your decision tho hun

Potty training is a tough one... I have a potty for Emily - not with any intention of training her yet, but so she sees it being around and thinks of it as normal... she does sometimes want to sit on it (in clothes) and knows its good when she does as she claps... That is where I will leave it for probably another six months before I even think about it...... its partly down to how good their speach is, as well as their awareness of what they are doing I think

not sure if I managed to help at all, but you asked about what we were doing so there you go waffle and all!

Hey kaly
Agree with all that's been said although our munckin doesn't have a dummy and doesn't suck her thumb either so no idea on that one!

Like peanut, I was advised that around a year you should start to wean them off the bottle so we're starting to slowly get munchkin onto a beaker of cow's milk twice a day (rather than a bottle of formula) but she still has a bottle in the evening - Once she's well used to a beaker in the day, then we'll tackle the bed time one and I'll get her onto a beaker but that's a few months away at least!!!

As for potty training, believe it or not, a lot of my friends have sworn by the Gina Ford book on potty training (even the ones who haven't used Gina up til then) although a few have said that the night time training isn't anywhere like as easy as she makes out and takes far longer, but apparently Gina ford is great for getting them dry during the day!! Might be worth thinking about???

The sleeping bag doesn't have to go when he's in the big bed - you can get them up to 36 months and you can buy little guard rails for cotbeds to stop them falling out in the night!! Bless.

But with a new baby on the way, like others have said, you need to be careful at not introducing too much new stuff at once - your wee man will need time to get used to changes in routines and things being different and he'll have a huge adjustment getting used to having a new wee one around - like people have said, he might go backwards for a bit but will get used to it after a while!!!


hope this helps
Lxx

Peanut – regarding dummies, I think you’re right it’s not as though he needs it to go to sleep and I think he’d get over it pretty quickly if I took at away.

As for bottles.. I never knew that about them having them after 12 months so thanks for the info. He happily has juice from a beaker so I can see no reason he wouldn’t take his milk from him. Gotta protect his little tushy pegs! Teddy-wise he has two for bedtime, a macca pacca and a fifi!

Cot – He sleeps in a cot bed and I’ve bought the baby a cot bed too and so I’m in no rush to get him out of it for when baby comes that I think I’ll leave for now.

Loocy – I actually bought the Gina ford contented baby book before I had ollie. Although I never followed it religiously I did get some useful tips I’ll maybe have to get on amazon and get me the potty training one (for when the time comes) thanks. I think I might get him a potty just so he knows what one is before we start which will probably be a good 6 months away yet depends on when he’s showing signs of being ready.

Everhopful – he’ll still be going to MIL’s for 2 days a week even when I go on maternity as he does enjoy going there and she likes looking after him so I’m not going to stop that. It will also help me out when baby comes I think it’s going to be soo hard dealing with two but hopefully I’ll cope.

He’s never sucked his thumb and so I doubt he’d start if I took away the dummy. Df did and MIL used mustard on his thumb to make him stop!

Kia – arguing with MIL is like arguing with a brick wall, completely pointless and it won’t change a thing. We’ve had problems in the past and now just agree to disagree! If I throw all his dummies away then she won’t be able to give him one I guess, I don’t think even she would be cheeky enough to go out and buy him some more behind my back..

Thanks again girls.

Karly x

Hope you dont mind me sticking my nose in too, just to say that i never followed any books for potty training the twins, i let them show me what they were ready for and when. I did have 2 potties in the lounge from the time they could walk, they were not allowed to play with them but i was quite happy for them to sit on it whether fully clothed or not. The main thing is not to stress about it, as already said every child is different and will do things in their own time and in their own way, i know this to be true with one of each. Obviously the best time to try is during the summer months when they can easily run around with no nappy on and as soon as you see any sign of a wee on its way stick them on the potty, if they wont stay there dont make them, but eventually they will get the idea. I know everyone has their own methods and different things work for different people, so just thought i would let you know what i did.

Regarding dummies, both of mine had them and you will just know when the time is right for them to go without. I am a great believer in watching your child for signs that they are ready for the next step in just about anything and it seems to work really well.

glad I could help karly

Hello

kalyjade, i hope you don't mind me joining you all for a moment I just wanted to say that i have only 13 months between my dd and my ds the whole way throughout my ds pregnancy i worried about routine, what people would think, how i would cope, how things should be done, you name it i panicked aboutit. However, 5years later i have realised that i did cope, that i should have listened to my own instincts, that there is no right or wrong way but more than anything my biggest regret is that because i worried so much i didn't enjoy them as much as i could have and that my dd had to grow up much faster than she should have. I really wish i had let her guide me, and that little ones always "get there in the end" just wish i had realised this sooner. I am planning #4 and i am determined to not worry so much
i am sure you will cope fantastically
Luv Heidi

hi Heidi

Thank you for your words of wisdom, i find it so reassuring to hear how others have 'survived' in a similar situation.

i know i need to stop worrying about it, there's nothing i can do about it now i suppose. i know once the times comes i'll manage ok.

Thanks again, and good luck TTC x x